Nothing freaks a woman out as the thought of sharing her husband with another woman, the thought of her favorite toy been inside of another woman’s private part drives her crazy nor is the imagination of having her man hitting another woman.
How can I handle a cheating husband? Sounds like a question the wife of a promiscuous man would ask. Many marriages have hit the rock as a result of cheating and no woman feels happy when her man cheats on her.
Lots of thoughts will be running through your mind on how to handle a cheating husband, and I am sure some of them are crazy right? Don’t worry, in this article, we will be serving a hot steaming recipe on how to handle a cheating husband.
How To Handle A Cheating Husband
Remember You Did Not Marry an Angel
Being conscious of the fact that your husband is human helps you handle infidelity a little easier than you would if you are thinking that your husband is a saint.
It is not bad to trust your husband but do not forget that we are all humans who are capable of backsliding; having that consciousness will help you heal easily in these painful moments of infidelity and betrayal.
Knowing that he is human; helps you help him find his feet when he has fallen, you need to be his strength because how you handle the situation determines and contributes to his behavior afterward.
If you make life hellish and miserable for him, he will seek solace and may find succor in the arms of other ladies out there.
Do not forget that the equation of men and women in the world is not balanced; there are more women than men. And as a saying goes, to every man out there, there are lots of women waiting to be his at a snapping of the finger.
We are not advocating for infidelity, neither are we being inconsiderate, but one thing you should know is that the deed has been done, oil has been spilled, we are looking for a remedy and not how to compound the problem. If you are not careful about how you handle the situation, sure it will boomerang.
Don’t Seek Revenge
Being betrayed by your husband can cause rage. That moment, your first instinct may be to punish your partner by trash-talking him to friends, on social media, or think about having an affair yourself to get even.
You may get a temporary sense of satisfaction from seeking revenge for these actions. Ultimately, be aware that they can work against you, as it doesn’t heal your mental health, keeping you in a state of rage instead of focusing on healing and moving on, alone or together.
It is also necessary you think before you tell your family. They will have strong opinions about what you should do, they might advise either leaving or staying.
But at the end of the day, nobody else knows what goes on in another person’s marriage. While you are thinking of how to handle a cheating husband, it’s best to keep the details private.
Never Stop Loving Him
Remember your wedding vows if you are Christian, remember the promises you made, in good times and in bad, that you will love and cherish each other till death do you part.
Remember the love you both shared before the incident, reflect on the affection that held you both together in the past, find reasons to give him another chance.
Shower him with love; the guilt of cheating on you will torture him. Use the weapon of love to bruise his soul, you the whipping of forgiveness to mess him and you will see him come back to you seeking ways to remedy and savage the situation.
Keep Your Kids Out Of the Situation
If you have kids, do not bring them into the situation, even if you have decided to end your marriage, sharing every detail about the affair will only put your children in an untenable position, causing them confusion and anxiety, making them feel stuck in the middle, and forced to take sides.
Open Up a Conversation
When you discover that he cheated, it is ok to flare up, but try and hold your calm, I know it sounds crazy but trusts me the effect will be magical.
Do not wait for him to open up as he may be struggling with guilt. Open up to him, tell him that you know about his affair but that it doesn’t stop the way you feel about him.
Tell him in all honesty that you love and still love him that he is breaking you and tearing you into shreds by his infidelity and promiscuity.
Tell him to feel free to tell you why he cheated, is anything the matter? Was it done out of mistake, was it intentional. What led to the event? Was he drugged? Was he under the influence of something?
Getting to the root of the matter will help you draw logical deduction on what happened and a better clue on what to do next.
Develop a Listening Ear
Your partner may be going through hell and you wouldn’t know because you do not care enough. We live in a patricidal society and men are taught that vulnerability is unmanly or unmanlike.
As a result of this, he may be going through hell while smiling and pretending, and before long, if another woman is giving him the desired attention, the chances of him developing feelings for her become high.
Sex, cheating, and infidelity are just miles away, and before long the shadow lurking around becomes the substance. Try to listen to your husband’s inner thoughts and give insightful answers, learn to sustain a conversation.
Make him yearn for discussion with you, give him reasons to always be home on time, give him reason to avoid messing up with teenagers and other girls but to hurry home at the close of work to come to see his family.
Related Post: Why Do Husbands Change After Having A Baby (5 Reasons You May Not Know)
Become His Best Friend
Become his best friend, do not be cynical. Just try and pay attention to know when he is sad or when he is in the lowliest points when he is depressed.
Your partner could be battling something and just needs reassurance that everything will be fine. He could be going through hell but would still want to be asked by you what’s wrong with him, maybe all he wanted was a listening ear.
Be gentle with your man and be his best friend, it would help you know when he has issues, then help him pull through it. It is a sure remedy and he will never forget you all the days of his life
Seek Counseling
Finding out that your partner is cheating on you emotionally or physically (or both) can be devastating and extremely overwhelming. Try not to get through this situation alone.
Before you decide on whether or not to end your marriage, it’s best advised to talk to a couple’s counselor, who will be neutral and can help you gain insight into what lead to the situation.
You can ask to have a deep conversation with your partner and share your feelings without losing your cool.
An experienced marriage counselor can help you communicate better and process feelings of anger, guilt, shame, and any other thing you might be feeling.
If in the end, you decide to end the marriage, at least your conscience is clear, you’ve tried your best to make it work.
Read Also: How To Keep a Relationship Strong After Having a Baby
Create Out Time for Devotions
Create out time for devotions, remember that man is also a spiritual being so create out time for your creator and the owner of the universe, and enthrone him in your home.
Create out time for you and your partner to study the word, dwell on it, deliberate on it and take turns to explain the scriptures. The words of the scriptures will hunt him when he preaches it after cheating.
Don’t Forget To Take Care of Yourself
Due to the shock, you may have some physical challenges due to stress such as nausea, diarrhea, sleep issues (too little or too much), shakiness, lack of concentration, lack of appetite, or overfeeding.
Once the initial shock has passed, try and take good care of yourself, eat healthy foods, stay on a schedule, have enough sleep, try and get some exercise each day, drink plenty of water, and also, try and have some fun.
Give Him Ultimatum and Be Ready To Move On
If all efforts fall to deaf ears despite all your efforts to remedy the situation, it’s time for an ultimatum. You can’t fix your marriage with a third party wedged in the middle, with the other woman.
You must make sure that there is no communication between your husband and the woman ever again. If you smell something fishy, then it’s time for you to pack up. Don’t let him explain, it’s good to leave while you still have your self-respect.
A lot of Circle of Moms member’s advice moving on if you suspect your husband is cheating a second time.
Read Also: Why Do Husbands Cheat After Having a Baby
Take-Home
We hope this article has given an in-depth discussion to answer the question, how to handle a cheating husband and also insights on how to salvage your relationship provided.
Save your relationship and make it stand the test by how you handle it. Remember whatever decision you make, just know that you deserve better, you need to be in a healthy loving relationship full of trust and happiness.
Just take it one day at a time, as you work through the aftermath over time, it is a phase and it will pass away.